Mr. Scott Wegener, co-creator and artist of the critically acclaimed comic book series Atomic Robo is at Anime Boston this weekend. He’s sitting in Artist’s Alley and uncomfortably close to Mookie. You should drop by if you’re in the area.

If you don’t, well, I won’t make any weird threats, but I do know where you sleep. And, while we’re on the subject, put those damn sheets in the wash already. It’s one more load, it won’t kill you!

No, 8-bit isn’t quite finished yet. We’re done with the meat of the thing, all that’s left is a page or two where we throw the bones into the trash.

In the meantime, help me help you help…me helping…uh.

Whatever, shut up.

But don’t shut up, because we need your input. Fill out this survey! And then shut up.

And then check out the latest episodes of Nerdy Show. Because I know you’ve been lax about keeping up with it. I can see what you do on your computer and, yes, you’re right to feel bad about what you get up to.

Devin, the madman behind the world’s greatest Atomic Robo costume, wishes to be dugg. I figure you folks can handle that request to the best of your abilities. Now with a working link!

Discerning readers among you will be happy to hear that the second issue of the new Atomic Robo series will come out April 14th.

Then that Friday, April 16th, at the Mondo Marvel panel during C2E2, they’ll finally announce my first project for Marvel Comics. Some of you should attend and cheer when they announce it so there’ll be someone cheering when they announce it.

So, I have this theory. I’ve shared it here before, but that was many years ago. It’s about car crashes and how to avoid them.

There’s tons of ways to have a collision, but fundamentally there’s only one way. To wit:

Two objects intersect the same space at the same time.

Therefore, the best way to reduce the risk of having a collision is to occupy any given section of space for as short a period of time as possible. The odds of there being another object in that exact same space at that slice of time are drastically reduced. As you drive faster you occupy any sub-division of space for less total time, so the faster you drive the less likely you are to be in a collision.

Example!

If your car is parked at Spot A, then it has a 100% chance of being rammed by any other car that attempts to occupy Spot A. If, instead, your car is zooming through Spot A at full speed, then there’s a vanishingly small chance your car will be anywhere near Spot A when another vehicle attempts to occupy that space.

Apply that logic to every individual inch of a journey, and the odds of you having a wreck at any given moment are next to nothing!

Now, there are those of you out there who are saying things like, “That’s not how logic works.” Or maybe, “You’re an idiot, Brian.”

That’s fair. But to you, I say this: make it legal for me to do, say, 90mph everywhere so I can put the theory to the test!

80mph would also be cool if there’s like a school zone or whatever. I’m not particular.

Still up in New Hampshire. Should be back Wednesday and pop out another 8-bit page for you crazy cats Thursday. This is the end of my travels for a few months, so we should be back to something like a regular schedule for a while.

Scott and I will be at GraniteCon in Nashua NH, this Sunday, March 14th. Come out of your igloo, get comics, signatures, T-shirts, sketches, and maybe kisses*.

In completely unrelated news, I now spend most of my working days in coffee shops and cafes where I can look like as huge a jack ass poseur as I think everyone else here is.

I keep to myself, since I’m actually working instead of artfully arranging half a dozen iProducts on the table to make sure everyone knows how easily swayed I am by advertising (seriously, look at this guy, you do not need a MacBook Air, iPod, and iPhone all in front of you while you read a book). This self-imposed exile can lead to awkward situations where I’m researching some kind of inane conspiracy theory horseshit and the people next to me think I’m an idiot.

Or, today, I find myself looking at half a dozen tabs opened to pages about the Confederacy and its sympathizers while as many black dudes sit around me. AHAHAHAhem.

“No, see, this is research. I don’t, y’know, this isn’t my thing. I write comic books about this robot. Like, okay, in the second volume? Look at all this Nazi shit I had to…ehhhhh. Okay, Volume Three. See, tons of research on Lovecrafffffuck.”

The asshole on the Mac doesn’t have this problem.

*not from us though.