I’m sitting in the cafe area trying, and failing, to not look like the kind of jack ass who goes to chain bookstore cafes and sits around for hours with a laptop. From here I can see the Humor section. There’s a book over there, and you could probably find it at our own Borders, called Penis Book. It has a hole in the middle. I’m going to assume there’s a “hilarious” image on each page.

I’m tempted to buy the book just for the awkward silence between myself and the cashier.

And then for the more awkward silence when I return it the next day, obviously disappointed.

And then, when I see an employee restock it, I’ll know Borders is the kind of place that’ll put a book on their shelves despite having cause to believe a penis was all over it.

Enjoy touching anything in public, everyone!